Thursday, August 26, 2010

100 Word Challenge: Teacher's Pet


"Teachers pet," she heard someone hiss just before closing the door quietly behind her. Buoyed up with a deep breath, she began the trek down the long corridor. On either side, children sat behind opaque walls unaware of each reluctant step carrying her closer to sticky paste, amber-colored liquid soap, and paint jumbled into one oppressive odor.

Approaching steps, jingling change and a soft tuneless whistle echoed down the passage urging her to stand on tippy-toes, desperately reaching for blood-stained paper.

"Please..."

"Here let me help you," he said pressing her budding body against the shelving; spiriting away her innocence.

This bit is in response to Velvet Verbosity's 100 Word Challenge.  Go head... check out the fabulous writings of other 100 word scribes. 

The photo above is a painting by my daughter that I photographed and added a crumpled brown bag texture to.

11 comments:

Unknown said...

Nicely done. and chilling.

septembermom said...

I could feel the tension. Well done.

Susan said...

Dark and ominous. What's happened to her?!

Teresa O said...

Lou...thank you for stopping by and for your thoughtful comments. Chilling is the effect I was going for, glad I achieved it.

Kelly...I love it when I feel a bit of tension in a writing and I'm so glad you did. Thanks for commenting.

Susan...What a wonderful question! Well...she grew up, became a highly successful attorney and pinned that teacher's ass to the wall. Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

Constance said...

very creepy - either the teacher raped her or a jealous student. I feel so sorry for her.

PattiKen said...

Creepy! But I was happy to read your comment that said she'd become a powerful woman who got justice in the end. Well done.

Sarah said...

What a chilling entry! Amazing where the prompts lead us sometimes!!

Teresa O said...

Aurora...Yes, I felt sorry for her, too, which is why I believe her story needs to be told.

Patti...As I wrote this the word creepy never came to mind, but several have used the word creepy to describe how it felt reading it, so I'm wondering if I used the wrong words to convey the snippet of a story. This may need retelling.
Thanks for stopping by!

Sarah...one of the wild things about the 100 word challenge is how a single word can take on so many different connotations. So cool, eh?

Thanks for leaving a comment!

dharmagirl said...

wow. you nicely captured the school setting, the tumult of emotions that the girl felt, and the sense of violation.

Unknown said...

I would not say creepy, but haunting. Your portrayal will be stuck in my head for at least the rest of the day!

Velvet Verbosity said...

These things happen right under the noses of others, and you've captured that well. From the accusation of "teacher's pet" to what that actually means for her.